Ryanair Rules

Yes that is right! They do exist, Ryanair fans, and I am one of them. It is true that they have taken away all glamour of flying, and I also agree with people who compare Ryanair to Tequila (it brings out the worst in people), but the point is that Ryanair does a great job at rule number 1 in flying: bringing people from point A to point B cheap and fast.

My job forces me to travel a lot, and I estimate that I have taken about 200 ryanair flights over the last 10 years.  And I agree with the stats: 88% of all Ryanairflights land on time. It does not necessarily mean that they leave on time (the exaggerate flight times), and we only have Ryanair’s word on their punctuality (they are not a member or IATA), but all that does not bother me, I only care about rule number 1 in flying: getting fast and cheap from point A to point B.

Valencia airport, Thursday 17^th of November: Ryanairflight 1919 between Valencia and Brussels Charleroi. We are queuing to board the plane and the stewardesses escort us to the stairs of the plane. At the very last moment, just before entering the plane the captain stops the boarding process because of a problem with the interior lightning of the plane, and after 15 minutes he decides that the plane was not in conditions to fly. What happened then was surreal… With any other airline this would have been the end of the trip, but not with Ryanair. The crew simply brought us to a different plane, we boarded, took off, and arrived in Brussels Charleroi with only 10 minutes delay!!

It was the most bizarre travel experience! And it raised a few questions such as “why was nobody using the other plane?”, “did the pilot have the keys?”, “they did not forget to load the luggages (and fuel) did they?”, etc. but it displayed again the no-nonsense approach of Ryanair. And… all the passengers were extremely satisfied. Ryanair scored twice that night: first they showed that a plane which is not 100% perfect does not fly, (even if the problem is only the interior lightning), and secondly they came up with an instant solution, ensuring even an almost on time landing.

Well done Ryanair! And the best moment of the evening occurred when we were walking from one plane to the other: We could hear a public announcement for the Iberia flight to Madrid: “Due to technical reasons the flight is delayed, more information in 50 minutes”. Eat this Iberia, and Spanair, and Brussels Airlines, and Air France, and all you other almost bankrupt airline monsters.

That is right folks, I love ryanair! And yes I know that I am challenging Murphy's law right now and that my next ryanair flight will probably crash into the Mediterranean. 

But just follow the basic guidelines for taking a Ryanair flight (see below), and I am sure that you will slowly change your mind about O’Leary and his unique Irish crew as well.

Cheers,

Lodewijk

Guidelines for taking a Ryanair flight.

1.       If you have the choice book the earliest flight of the day. The earlier the flight the more probable an on time departure.

2.       Avoid luggage, and I mean, doing an extreme effort to avoid bringing more than 10kg to the airport, the maximum allowed as cabin luggage. Travelling without luggage is not only cheaper but it saves you the frustration of queuing at check-in. You print out the boarding pass at home, show up 45m before the flight and walk straight on the plane.

3.       If you do bring luggage to the airport, come early. Ryanair personnel open the check in counters pretty late so by that time a large queue of angry passengers will be there.

4.       Buy priority boarding. For only 5 euro you feel like a business class passenger and you save yourself the humiliating endless queue for the “other row” passengers.

5.       Switch off your brain. People tend to act nervous and strange when they have to fly, especially when they have to queue for a long time at check-in and boarding. And iPod does miracles in terms of not getting annoyed by other passengers.